Shit Maggie Goreng Girl Says (Part 1)

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

In my company, we operate with a very lean team of slightly over 20 people.

Despite the lean team, we have very colourful characters among us! One of which, is the Maggie Goreng girl.

No joke, she looks like Derpette.

How Maggie Goreng girl got her name

Maggie Goreng girl pisses the hell out of me with her senseless questions and answers. So one day, pantry auntie asked me what I'd like to have for lunch. (She usually goes out and pack food for us cuz we work in a forest on top of a mountain. And to get food, she would need to hike for 49 days, braving the ferocious wolves and rain and wind.)

Now I'm the one saying shit wtf.

Pantry Auntie,"Jac, what would you like for lunch?"

Me,"Hmm... how about Maggie Goreng?"

Just then, Derpette heard me ordering Maggie Goreng and decided to Intercom me, even though we are like 2 seats away.

RIIING RIING!! RRRRIIIIINNGGG RIIIING!!!

Me,"Hello?"


Derp: "Hi Jac! Are you ordering Maggie Goreng?"

Me,"Uh-huh."

Derp: "Can I check with you something?"

Me: "Yeah?"

Derp: "What's in Maggie Goreng?"


Me: "Well......... Maggie Mee, veg, urm.. fishcakes.. wtf it's just an array of nonsense fried with maggie mee!"

Derp: "Oh, eee sit spicy?"

-______-||| behind the phone.

Me: "Well, it depends on individual, isn't it?"

Derp: "Ohkay.. is it a really huge pack?"

Me: "THAT, depends on individual too."

Derp: "Will I be able to finish it?"


WTF? WHY THE FUCK IS MY COLLEAGUE ASKING ME IF SHE CAN FINISH A PACK OF MAGGIE GORENG?

HOW THE F WILL I KNOW?????

So, I calmly replied her, "Well... why don't you order it and try it for yourself?"

And after 15 minutes of consideration, Derpette says, "I think I'd better not buy it. I'll see how it's like when Jac gets her order!"


And so, the name Maggie Goreng girl is born.

Shit she says

Maggie Goreng girl says a lot of shit, which I honestly think she doesn't mean it. But that doesn't mean it is of lesser shit, LOL.

So one day, we were eating in the pantry and we were talking about Coke Light and Coke.

Me: "I drink Coke Light cuz I honestly can't taste the difference between them so... lesser calories is good!"

Manager: "I always drink Coke! Coke and Coke Light is not the same lor."


Derp: "Ya! I always drink Coke also, cuz wanna drink, might as well drink the best (tasting)!"

Me: "Oh no wonder you drink KOI like 75% one wtf."

Derp: "Ya! I think it's just nice!"

Manager & I simultaneously: "It's too sweet lor please! Btw, it's unhealthy to drink so much sugar in your drinks!"

***

And then we went on to talk about the world's unhealthiest food - like eating chicken skin, for example. And Derpette says that she takes chicken skin too.

Budden suddenly....

Me: "I love to drink bubble tea cuz I lovelovelovelovelove to chew the bubbles!"

Derp: "HUH! BUT THAT IS SO FATTENING!!"

Me: "????????"

Derp: "I only drink 10 bubbles from my bubble tea."


Says the person who drinks Coke, eat Chicken Skin and drinks 75% KOI bubble tea sugar.



Shit Maggie Goreng girl says. Part 1.

More up soon. Promise.

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6 comments

  1. HAHAHAHA!!! PART TWO FASTER!!! This is hilarious. you have a clown working at your workplace.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Haha! I won't call her a clown, but she amuses my colleagues with her punch lines... and makes me go WTF at her most of the time.

    On good days, she makes me laugh. On bad days, I feel like strangling her LOL.

    ReplyDelete
  3. LOL!!!
    If I'm you, I will use a knife to stab myself literally...haha

    ReplyDelete
  4. Lol i saw your recent tweet mentioning this maggie goreng girl n wondered what its all abt (curious aka kpo) lol. This post is funny! Ur colleague is erm, interesting lol. =D

    ReplyDelete
  5. MUAHAHAHAHAHA~ i almost BURST out LOL in office!! part 2! part 2! i want part 2!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. HAHAHAHHAAHHAA!!!! This would make an even funnier sitcom than HIMYM!

    ReplyDelete

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